Limmerick
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Who kept something rare in a box
One night, as dawn broke,
The creature awoke
And ran off with his shoes and his socks
2. There once was lady called Tate
Who won a live bear at a fete
To her home it was led,
But it hadn't been fed
And the police got there seconds too late.
3. A handsome young German called Fritz,
On seeing a friend do the splits,
With a triumphant cry,
Shouted, 'Here let me try!'
And broke into two equal bits.
4. A trainee magician called Mick
Made a frightful mistake with trick,
When he turned a small boy,
His mum's pride and joy,
Irreversibly into a brick.
5. A curious young man from Calcutta
Was known as a bit of a nutter.
After prawn vindaloo
And a Guiness or two
He'd lie, very still, in the gutter.
6. A handsome young fellow called Frears
Was attracted to girls by their ears,
He's traverse the globe
For a really nice lobe,
And the sight would reduce him to tears.
7. There once was a camper called Jack
Who found a huge snake in his pack.
He cut it in two,
Gave half to the zoo,
And then put the other half back.
8. There once was a fellow called West
Who found it quite hard to get dressed.
He used to quite dread
Putting socks on his head
And getting both socks through his vest.
9. A handsome young fellow called Lance
Had over a hundred Great- Aunts.
He kept some in drawers
And some under floors
And the judge never gave him a chance.
10. A kindly old fellow called Clore
Gave all that he had to the poor;
But, alas and alack,
They would not give it back,
So he's not giving them any more.
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Posted {posted}
rachelkellett@rediffmail.com